Once upon a time in a far away place lived a nerdy little fellow named Dude.
Dude wanted to play with the other kids.
He envied the popular kids.
But the other kids pointed at him and laughed.
So Dude hid. That's why he was called Hiding Dude. Get it? Pretty soon everybody forgot what Hiding Dude even looked like because he was always hiding.
Hiding Dude lived in the forest with his Grammy and his Uncle Oscar.
Every day Hiding Dude would come home and Grammy would put his dinner on the table, then she'd go listen to some music while he ate.
One day when Hiding Dude came home the house was dark. There were no good smells coming from the kitchen and no music playing. He walked in and Grammy didn't come to greet him. He walked into her bedroom and there was Grammy in bed with the blanket pulled up high.
"Grammy, your hands," said Little Hiding Dude, "They're so hairy and it isn't even a full moon yet."
" The better to touch you with , my dear," answered Grammy.
"Grammy, your ears are so big. Can you listen to your music better?"
"The better to hear you with, my dear."
"Grammy, your eyes are so red, are your allergies bothering you?"
"The better to see you with, my dear."
" Grammy, your teeth are so big and sharp."
"The better to eat you with," shouted Grammy and jumped out of the bed.
It wasn't really Grammy at all. It was the big bad wolf who had just huffed and puffed and blown down the little pigs house next door.
The big bad wolf grabbed Little Hiding Dude before he could hide and ate his head.
So now he was Little Dead Hiding Dude. The end.
The story Mom told went something like that. Now sleep well everyone.
Your pal, Fudge