Sunday, January 16, 2011

My MM Entry By Fudge

Last year I entered Mango Minster and by some weird error I didn't win. I wanted to demand a recount, but Mom convinced me that the Supreme Court would rule against me, so I dropped it.
I think I should enter the 'Good Old Boys' division, but Mom says NO, that I definitely belong in the 'Bad Boy' group. I think this is another example of Mom being unfair. Let me explain.
Mom used to think she wanted me to be a show dog. OK, I was willing to give it a try. Then I saw what being a show dog meant. First I had to have lots of baths and haircuts. Then we went to this big place with lots of people and dogs all over the place. It looked like it might be fun, lots of other dogs to play with and some of them were pretty nice looking lady dogs.
We waited around for awhile, then it was our turn. We went into the ring with some other dogs and walked around in circles. Then some strange dude that I didn't even know came over and looked in my mouth, then he felt me up. Can you believe it? Then Mom and I were supposed to walk up and down so the weird dude could watch us. I decided to give him something to watch, so I hopped. Mom told me to stop, but there were some people there who laughed, so I knew they appreciated me and I hopped some more. I hopped all the way in both directions. The weird feely dude gave the ribbons to another dog that didn't hop as well as I did. That dog just dragged his butt back and forth and nobody even laughed. After trying a couple times, Mom decided that maybe I wouldn't make it as a show dog. Good thinking, Mom.
Next she decided I should be an obedience dog. We went to school and I learned really fast that great treats happened whenever I listened and did what Mom said. Mom said I was a star pupil. Of course I was. This was easy stuff like sit and down and stay and heel. That stuff is a cinch. Then Mom entered us in a Rally trial. Piece of cake!
The first day I did all the sit and down and stay and heel stuff and the judge gave Mom some ribbons and gave me a squeaky toy. Great! The second day we went back and did all the same stuff for a different judge. OK, but this is getting kind of boring. That judge gave Mom some ribbons and me another toy. Then we had to go back for the third day and do it all again. What!! How many times does a guy have to do this boring stuff, anyway?
The third day we started heeling and sitting and all that. Then Mom told me to down and stay. OK, I did it, but I looked up at the judge lady and she looked just as bored as I was. She's been watching all those other dogs do this stuff all morning. I figured she'd like a little entertainment, so I rolled over a couple times. Mom said "No, Fudge" so I jumped up and licked Mom's face, then I jumped as high as I could and I can jump really high, then I spun around in a circle a few times. Then I laid back down and finished doing the stuff Mom told me to do. I glanced over at the judge lady and she didn't look happy. She wasn't laughing and she just walked away. The judge lady didn't give us any ribbons or toys. I hope that judge lady got a sense of humor transplant because her's was damaged beyond repair.
I like toys, but not as much as some of my pack mates. I mostly like to just take them away from the others. Then if I have one and they don't I like to walk back and forth in front of them and stick the toy in their faces to show them that I have it and they don't. With Noah I go over and shove him a little and stick the toy right in his snooter. Noah's a wimp and I love to tease him. He get's all upset and runs to Mom and she tells me to stop, but as soon as she looks away I shove him again.
I have a couple of old blog posts that you can look at if you want to know me better. One is my concession speech from last year when I didn't win at MangoMinster. Mom told me to be gracious. I did my best.
Another post is about a complaint I had when Mom started training that wimpy Noah. She actually thinks he can be a Rally dog. Come on!
So now you know me a little and you can see what a great, fun loving guy I am. So vote for me, Fudge, for Bad Sport of the Year.


Bella Roxy & Macdui said...

You've got a good campaign there, Fudge. We like your trying to add some fun to dog shows! Some humans just have no sense of humour!

XXXOOO Daisy, Kendra & Bella

Scrabblequeen said...

Wow, Fudge, we kind of agree with you. Everything you've told us sounds just like what we'd expect from a Good Ole Boy! Too bad there isn't a category for Best Comedian, you'd win that one for sure!
Woofs. Sahsa and Misty

The Daily Pip said...

You have my vote!! Oh yeah, I don't get to vote!

Your pal, Pip

The Race Against Time said...

Your story just made my day... you sure am a very funny fella Fudge... and judges with NO SENSE OF HUMOUR should just stay at home and and sleep. Don't you agree with me?

I love you Fudge.. and i ams a rootings for you for the MM :)

woofs & licks,

Rocky Creek Scotties and Rocky Creek Ramblings said...

Fudge, we'll be glad to vote for you - but we don't think you are a bad sport - you're just a fun loving dog!!

Lilly, Piper, Carrleigh and Ruairi

SissySees said...

Fudge, you'll always have our vote. Gretchen and I also had quite a debate over her entry; she didn't want to be a Cracker Dog, but I didn't want her competing against Sissy, who CLEARLY had to be a DIVA...

Lapdog Creations said...

Go Fudge!!!

Two French Bulldogs said...

Now that was a good entry!! I WOULD have demanded a recount..ut oh, I'm a good ole boy too, BOL
Benny & Lily

♥I am Holly♥ said...

Go Fudge!!! We love your campaign!! Take it to the Supreme Court if you don't win!! Lots of love, Holly and mom

LizzieJane said...

You have my vote Fudge! I think you are great just the way you are!

Marjie said...

You know I voted for you last year! However, since Thor is a judge in a different category, I think ethics prohibit us from joining in People's Choice voting. Sorry.

But I still want to know when you're running for Congress. You're very much like some of those clowns in Washington.

Stella said...

You have our votes, Fudge, you are the perfect Bad Sport, it seems to me.

This year if you have to walk the oval, be sure and take a dump, or toss your cookies. That will get their attention!

Cheers and hugs,

Stella, Zkhat and Mom

How Sam Sees It said...

We liked your story! We will root for you!


Molly the Airedale said...

You definitely sound like a bad sport to us, Fudge! Good luck to you!

Love ya lots,
Maggie and Mitch

♥♥ The OP Pack ♥♥ said...

You convinced us, Fudge. Actually we agree with Sasha and Misty because we thought your case was pretty funny. Mom said she really needed a chuckle or two tonight too. Lots of luck to you in the MM.

Woos ~ Phantom, Thunder, and Ciara

Jed and Abby in MerryLand said...

We read that you wanted to enter as a Good Ol' Boy, but you made an excellent argument that you are, in fact, entered in the appropriate category. Your mom knows you really well. BTW, might want to be careful with bullying Noah so much. Some day he's going to grow into a strong, mature dog and he's going to clean your clock. Just saying. You have some of the best Bad Boy photos going. Overflowing with attitude! Good luck this year.

Jed & Abby

gMarie said...

Fudge - you crack me up! I hope the judge did indeed get a 'funny bone' transplant. It does sound like hers was broken. g

Martha said...

Goodness what an impressive campaign Fudge!
We vote for you - even though we are supposedly entering Martha in that category!
Still with your sense of humour we should get on well.
I will call round for you in the sports car and we can go to the Winners Ball together.
Much love
Bailey xxxx

the many Bs said...

oh Mr Fudge! we think you are a true Bad Boy. but it's not your fault. you're way too smart and handsome to be confined to those silly rules that humans have. it makes much more sense to be a Real Dog. we think you seem like a good contender for the MM award, since that one is judged by dogs, right?!


Pat H. said...

Hey, Fudge! Big here. Love your campaign. If you want to be Bad Boy of the Year, you gotta change your image from cute, cuddly and lovable to tough lookin.

Ask my mom how I know. Spike up that do on the top a little. Wear your muscle shirt, stop being so cute. That's what mom tells me. You got my vote!

Tough guy,
Mr Big Stuff
PS I still sleep on mom's head at night, does that make me a cute wimp like Mom says?

Anonymous said...

Fudge you are definitely a naughty guy :) I'm with you and the judges. Who wants to do the same thing over and over and over and over... Nutty! Now flyball looks like a lot of fun! Just runnin and jumpin and snaggin a ball real fast! I like speed :D

Waggin at ya,

PeeS: Not that it'll count (judges consider the craziest things!)but you've got my vote! And if I can figure out how to do it, I'll vote fur ya a bunch of times! :D

AFSocksScylla said...

We understand completely about not wanting to do the same thing over and over. Apparently humans are very slow learners. It is so hard to train them to do new and fun stuff. Why it took us hours to get our humans up at 2AM to play.

Anonymous said...

I bet dogs do wonder why we do some of the events with them that we do.. Luna's love is not the show ring, but she DOES love that she only has to stand there and she gets fed chicken and liver.. and then trot pretty around the ring. She does not hate the show ring like I have seen some others, and is fine with the judges touching her, but she would much prefer to be outside hunting some birds.
I hope to do some rally type stuff with her once we finish the hunt training. The smart dogs do get bored, and a bored smart dog is a lot to handle.
Nice blog, looks like you have your hands full
Take care

Unknown said...

Go, Fudge, go! Your friends down south are rooting for you! You are the epitome of the category...Love you! Bitsy and Brody

doyle and mollie said...

aw fudge we sure thing you are something special!!! loves and licks xxxx